Things Romantic Movies Get Wrong About International Long Distance Relationships
When it comes to long distance relationships, there is no clear cut guide on how exactly to survive one. When it all boils down to it, whether or not your relationship will survive the distance is up to the both of you.
So for the inexperienced, they often turn to internet articles and online forums for advice. For the more romantic types, they may choose to settle down in front of their favorite romantic comedy in the hopes that they may unlock the secrets to a successful long distance relationship at the hands of Mr. Tom Hanks and Channing Tatum.
However, because Hollywood is in the business of selling popular movies, they do get a lot of facts wrong about long distance relationships, to the point where they end up romanticizing them.
To give you a hand, here we have a handy list of common misconceptions that movies get wrong about long distance relationships and what the realities of an international long distance relationship are.
The misconception: “As long as you love each other, it’ll be enough to save your
The reality: One thing that the media gets wrong about relationships, and not just long distance
relationships, is that in the end, love will triumph over every hardship the two of you will face. Now while love is an important component to any successful relationship, it isn’t the deciding factor of the outcome of your relationship.
It takes much more that love to make a relationship work, especially a long distance one. Trust,
communication, emotional support, willingness to forgive, these are only some of the many things a
relationship needs in order to succeed. When it comes to long distance relationships, it’s especially
important to trust and keep an open communication with your partner.
The misconception: “Long distance doesn’t work, you’ll break up eventually”
The reality: This has to be one of the most prevailing misconceptions about long distance relationships and often discourages couples from giving long distance a shot. It’s hard not to believe this, especially after seeing the likes of Ross Geller and Ted Mosby on popular television shows give international long distance a try, and ultimately, fail.
I’m not going to give you the statistics on the success rate of long distance relationships, because you
and your significant other are more than just a statistic on a computer screen. But long distance
relationships work, as long as the both of you are willing to put in the effort to make it work.
The misconception: “You’re long distance, it’s okay to date other people”
The reality: No. Just no. Long distance or not, you are in a committed long distance relationship with your partner, and unless you have some kind of mutual agreement going on, you should respect your partner enough to not take advantage of the long distance to date other people without their knowledge. For some reason, many people think that just because you’re in an unorthodox relationship means you don’t follow the rules of a typical relationship.
A lot of long distance relationships are founded on trust and communication, and dating other people
behind your partner’s back is the easiest way to break your relationship.
The misconception: “You should check up on them every single minute to make sure
they’re not doing anything behind your back”
The reality: Remember when we said that communication is one of the main foundations of an
international long distance relationship?
You should also understand that there’s a line between open communication and paranoia. If you have the need to check up on your partner every minute of the day because you suspect them of seeing someone behind your back, then you should rethink how you perceive yourself, your partner, and the relationship.
Constantly checking up on your partner is one way of showing them that you don’t trust them, and it might be time that you rethink whether or not you’re ready to be in a long distance relationship. Either you discuss it with your partner, or you might have to think about being in a more typical relationship.
Because if you continue being paranoid about your partner and relationship, you may eventually end up resentful of each other because of the mistrust.
The misconception: “Long distance relationships are the easiest kind of relationship,
all you need to do is text or call them once in awhile to let them know you’re still alive
and in the relationship”
The reality: Long distance relationships are hard. It’s not just checking in on your partner via text and call, you have to put in the effort of a regular relationship while compensating for the distance between the both of you.
Keeping your relationship afloat while not being able to see your partner is difficult. It’s trusting your
partner enough to be still be committed to you despite the lack of constant face to face contact.
It’s Skype dates interrupted by people barging into your room and Netflix movie dates ruined by a crappy internet connection. It’s lying in bed and hugging a shirt or a hoodie that smells like them, because you miss having them next to you. It’s saying goodbye at the bus station or airport, wondering when you’ll see them again. Long distance relationships are no walk in the park, but if it all works out, it’s definitely worth it.
The misconception: “You should center your life around your long distance
The reality: While it’s important to give importance to your romantic relationship, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t live your own life as well. Long distance relationships are a great way to discover who you really are outside of your relationship. Meet new people and try out different hobbies.
Develop yourself more into an even better person who your significant other would be even prouder to be with.
The misconception: “It’ll always work out in the end”
The reality: This particular reality applies to all relationships, not just long distance ones. No matter how you follow all the advice that you read to the letter and do everything right, there always exists the possibility that your relationship might not work out in the end.
And you need to be okay with that. Your relationship is not your life, and you will recover from it. It might be hard, it might be painful, but you will get past this. In this particular vein, perhaps, it really will work out in the end.
What did you think about the post? If you have any experience in long distance relationships, leave us a comment below. For more in depth articles about long distance relationships and international travel, take a look at our website: International Dating Club!
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